Today's Thoughts

Today was a good day at school, yesterday was a good day as well. I have been thinking about some of the things I have been thinking about lately and even some of the things I have posted over the last month and I realized that maybe I haven't been saying things quite like they are. I think I have been feeling pretty down about school lately and even saying that it's been really rough, but really, it's gone really well. Yeah, it's been kind of crazy and I haven't been able to have a "normal" day or schedule just yet. Maybe I don't know all of my students yet and have a few new problems that I haven't had to deal with before. Maybe I am still getting used to having another co-worker around and having to remember to explain a few things before just doing them. Maybe I am still just getting used to everything. BUT all things considered, school is great! This is the first year that I have gone to school and been excited for at least one thing each day. This is the first year that I can say that I am happy with how things turn out each day because I'm not sweating the small stuff and seeing the positive side of everything. I can truly say that I am happy. I really enjoy my job. I enjoy my class. I enjoy my co-workers. I enjoy the other students in 6th grade. Compared to the first month of school in prior years this is probably the best one I have had. I laugh with my students every day. I feel comfortable and confident in my abilities. I go to school and I have fun every day even when things are crazy.

So, what have I been complaining about? I think it's easier to focus on some of the more negative aspects or to talk about them with others. Usually, I let my school life interfere with my home life and vice versa, but lately, I think I have been letting my home life interfere a little bit more than usual. I can definitely say that the beginning of the school year started so well because I was happy at home. I was in a bit of a rut at the end of last year and a little through the summer, but a lot of things have changed since then. The dynamics of my house have changed drastically and the people I hang out with and get to talk to have changed a bit as well. A really good friend of mine became a really good friend of mine right after I came back from California this summer. I don't think that they realize how much of a difference they made, but they really yanked me out of a rough spot. Not that I wouldn't have eventually made it out on my own, this person just sped things up quite a bit. I was excited to get out and do things rather than just let things happen when they happened. I found more joy in the little things in life and started looking at my life as an adventure to be lived and explored rather than just a day to day occurrence. I was able to start the school year off with not just a good attitude, but a great one! I also learned the importance of exclamation points! Life is just more exciting when you write about it with exclamation!

Has my life completely changed? No. Do I look at things a little differently...yeah, you could say that. The thing is that I used to see life like this before, I guess I just forgot. I had the thought sometime in the last year that people used to comment about my smile all of the time, but I haven't heard anyone mention it in awhile. I realized that I must not be smiling as much as I used to be. When I fly home, especially at Christmas, my goal is to be the best passenger ever! I know that it must be pretty hectic around the airport and on the planes especially with everyone running around and worrying about themselves and their travels that those working around and for them get caught up in the frustrations or even ignored. I try to smile as much as I can once I start traveling if only to make a difference to one person. So, why not do this all of the time? Not only do other people feel better, but in the process, I'm happier too. My latest outlook on life...smile and make people notice (even if you don't really feel like it all of the time).

So, back to one of my original thoughts...I've been saying that school is rough and hard lately, but it really hasn't. Life is rough and hard sometimes, but it doesn't have to be all aspects. School has its ups and downs, but really, it's going great! I've let a few things from home life get me down a bit lately, mostly I've been confused about a few things which frustrates me (I'm supposed to know everything), and that gets in the way of seeing everything in a positive light. Things are now put in order. More things are making sense, others...not so much, but that's ok, I don't have to know everything right now.